out of my own script

This blog comes in after alot of procrastination. For the past few days i have been wanting to write. Everything time i thought I'd sit down and write, i got caught with something or the other - a fresh episode of a sitcom(a recent addiction i am not proud of)or poker on face book or catching up with sleep.

someone once suggested that i should write more often. For what reason? i am not very sure. But somehow only upheavals- emotional ones, generally, nudge me to write.

i guess this is such a time. i have been free for some time now and been weighing my "what after graduation" options. the build up till my graduation was smooth. i always knew what i wanted next and mostly got it. now suddenly i stand on a quivering platform. i am directionless. i tried to resent this cluelessness but i guess it got better of me.

To overcome this discontent i took to morning walks. i step out every morning, stop at a particular shop, buy smokes and walk a little further down to a secluded park. i light up my cigarette and sit at the base of a slide. it was while sitting there one of these days i realised the need for a little introspection. this disconcerting exercise made me realise that i have fallen out of my own script.